The only time I felt bad, no ... rather, the only time I felt responsible for the discomfort of someone, it was last year. And who would have wanted to do less damage.
I went to look because there was more. Because it would pain me.
gave me it's always about safety.
were always on hand, from each other.
spoke with him right up. It was my body and soul healing.
But by being transparent manner, could not keep fixing what was germinating inside.
For him, things he was being difficult, and felt unfair to have to hide their feelings, disguise.
That afternoon, where I felt bad about everything I wrote ACA, and having the feeling that in a past life have I been flower bitch, and in this life came to pay, made me angry. At least I could remember everything bad I did not ???!!!
Thus, whenever the emotional edge of the ledge, I found a sad man.
My closest friend could no longer holding back because he had his own backpack punishment, and guilt feelings.
And I said in the face and did not see me as a friend, that in this year's feelings changed, he tried to fight it, so I am encouraged to know people, because it could not be, because I had been the great love of his friend. How he could take care of him if he had failed because it should never look at me.
And that was hurting him without noticing.
I also made clear that his love had begun to be born in the same year (2009).
I felt so, so bad that I went to hell as if Satan himself after me.
was plunged into the biggest problems with my old patient, with a partner who was coming down again (the Tano), with the anniversary of Diego (a decade since his departure), with the anniversary of my brother (5 fucking years), my daughter was ill and had to go to a psychologist, I cited the school because she was not studying he was always distracted, he could get to repeat the year (all thanks to my ex-pig) with my quilombos ex, walks by the Court and police stations, etc. Thing we needed was to add another mambo more.
And I hated life, and I said to myself that preys the world with me.
could go so long??
of which I was never put the other cheek, but also went through life cagándosela anyone.
I felt alone.
That night I did not want to get home, my cellular Marce sounded because I was looking like crazy (Santi, for the first time in these 18 years we know, let me go).
Me: - What do you want?
Marce - Pau, I spoke with James, where are you?
Me: - I do not give more, but I'm not asshole, I'm not going to kill myself. Mely I need.
Marce: - So, you're no fool, but sometimes a distraction, not ...
understood his concern. Last year, with all that in tow, I was on several occasions to the verge of a vehicle that ran over me. As not sleep because of the nerves and worries, living zombie.
I said where I was, and in a short time, I had a Marc by my side.
remember having big hug.
He told me cute things, trying to make me think I'm not angry with James for having said that truth.
But that was not only.
Actually, it was the combo I had in my life.
had bottomed out, and the coup de grace was given to me Santi.
had lost my friend and I tore the soul.
That night, I could not sleep.
And selfishly I thought, "Why did not continue pretending?"
For several days we had no contact. Although we both knew the other by our friends.
In his case, gave me room to lower the decibels and understanding that my mind should be firm and lucid for battle on my own wars.
In my case, I did not know what to say. From time to time had become a stranger.
We met in the least thought ...
But that's for next Monday!
Good weekend to everyone!!
A big hug!
0 comments:
Post a Comment